06 July 2020

Our First Winner, and Her Easter Basket

Hello all - Well, July is taking itself very seriously, at least here in Philadelphia, where it is ridiculously hot and supposed to become hotter and more humid as the week goes on.  Ick.

I am happy to announce our first winner for Christmas in July 2020:


One of her funniest holiday memories was this:

i was an only child...so it was a big deal to visit cousins on holidays. We all got up early one Easter morning, only to have my youngest cousin announce to all 5 of us...you can't eat your candy because I licked it all, and it's covered with my cooties, so it's all MINE. This didn't bother me at all....she left my Easter basket alone, because it was full of black olives, cottage cheese, and cocktail onions. The Easter bunny knew me well; and I had never thought of my Easter haul as unusual until that Easter morning. (Boy, did Cousin Jane get a lickin' for her antics, though.)

A fun little trip down memory lane!

I loved this answer on so many levels - not just her cousin "getting hers," so to speak, but also the contents of her Easter basket.  So many people would not be willing to give their kids the things they actually liked, because they weren't the usual chocolate bunnies, jellybeans, etc.  Congratulations, Steph!  To claim your prize, please send an e-mail to: thekittyknitterATverizonDOTnet, with your name, address, zip, etc., and I can get the package ready to send.

As for my answer, one of my funniest memories is from a Christmas dinner.  My parents went all out at Christmastime (which is probably why we were so poor the rest of the year), and would always kind of collect extra people to come to Christmas dinner, which in our house was on Christmas Eve.  One year, it was the first time my father's Uncle Bill and his wife Aunt Viola were on their own for the holidays, as both of their adult daughters had moved to California.  So my parents decided to invite them to come and join us. 

A bit of background:  Uncle Bill was well known as being really really cheap, and my father used to always say that "he was so cheap, he wouldn't pay a nickel to see Christ jump off the cross."  (!)  Aunt Viola was an amazing cook but whenever you went to their house, the servings were always incredibly tiny - so we all used to wonder, was she really that good of a cook, or were we just always hungry when we got home because there wasn't enough food ...

Anyway, when my mother called to invite them, Aunt Viola asked what she should bring.  My mother said to bring something that they always have for Christmas dinner that they would miss by not eating at home.  Aunt Viola said she would bring some of her homemade noodles. 

Well.  HOMEMADE NOODLES!!  We were in heaven, waiting for that goodness, as my mother never made homemade anything, and we talked about those stupid noodles most of the day in anticipation.  When dinnertime came, everyone was around the table, and just as we all had our plates full, and everyone started to eat, Aunt Viola asked my mother where the homemade noodles were.  My mother responded, "Oh my God, things were so hectic, I put the bag on the table, and then forgot to make them at all!," to which Aunt Viola said that was too bad, but she guessed she would just take them home with her after dinner.  (Meaning we would never actually taste said noodles, ever.)

Only later in the evening when all the guests were gone did we get the actual story.  I guess when my mother talked to Aunt Viola on the phone, she said she would bring homemade noodles because "we always have them at Christmas, and [Uncle] Bill loves them."  So when they arrived she handed my mother a small plastic bag with the homemade noodles in them.  As in, ONE SERVING - for Uncle Bill!  Because you know, he loved them!  Both of my parents said there was no way they were cooking something that had only one serving and then giving it to a single person to enjoy.  (Needless to say, it was said in much more colorful terms at the time.)

As you can imagine, this is the stuff of family lore.  Uncle Bill and Aunt Viola never joined us for Christmas - or any holiday dinner - ever again, because for a few years their daughters' sent them plane tickets to visit, and eventually they moved to California to live near them.

So the next time someone offers to bring something for a meal, you may want to ask them about the number of servings ... 😂


Kym said...

Oh, my goodness! Your family ALWAYS cracks me up. You have the best stories! :-)

Araignee said...

Your noodle story is hilarious. Holidays seem to ramp up the crazy in all of us. I know I'm guilty.

steph said...

aren't family legends great!!! Every time I get together with my cousins (which includes that cousin Jane of the licking Easter candy) they always bring up Black Christmas. I wasn't exactly part of this, but talk about legendary!! There were 4 kids in that family...stairsteps all two years apart, and this particular Christmas they were particularly naughty. They were warned over and over and over, but...hey...Santa ALWAYS comes. Well, this year he didn't. My aunt and uncle returned every gift they had bought...and CHristmas morning---NADA. They all said the worst part was going back to school after Christmas and when everyone was asking what Santa brought....they had to say 'nothing'. One of them had the post Christmas writing assignment--what was your favorite gift this year. Now THAT was legendary!!!

Nance said...

Oh my goodness! Who does that? LOL. Well, as the saying goes, "You can pick your friends, but you can't pick your relatives."

Your dad's saying about how cheap your uncle was is hilarious. Your parents really had some colorful ways of putting things.

Mereknits said...

I can see why they were never invited back, how rude! Glad you can all laugh about it.

Wanderingcatstudio said...

Both those stories are great!

I have an aunt and uncle almost exactly like yours. My brother lived with them for a short time (we were moving two streets over from them, but not until a month into the school year, and my brother wanted to do the whole year at one school). She made roast beef once, and my brother said it was the size of one serving of a roast my Mom would have made. He said most meals were ridiculously small, but he figured out why eventually - she had a secret snack cupboard, and ate chips and cookies all day, so she was never hungry by dinner, and really only cooked for her husband. My other favourite memory of her is this:
I have a December birthday. With the holidays being so hectic, we saw everyone at Christmas and they gave us presents then. On the year of my 16th birthday she handed me a card and said very loudly and proudly..."This is for your birthday AND Christmas". It was a Christmas card that she wrote "and happy birthday" in, and it contained a whole $5. $2.50 for each occasion. (It was 1995, not 1975 when $2.50 would have gone pretty far!)

Dee said...

Oh my word ...........can you imagine not bringing enough to share. But, I suppose family has "one of those kind" in it. We did.

Congrats to Steph!

WendyKnits said...

That reminds me of the time my brother and sister-in-law were moving and my sister-in-law happily told me that my mom said she would bring them lunch. I said "have extra food on hand" and she said "What are you talking about? Your mom is bringing lunch." I said "Trust me on this." Well, after the move, my SIL called me, laughing so hard she could barely speak. My mom showed up with "sandwiches" -- one for each of them. Said sandwiches consisted of two slices of ultra-thin sliced "diet" bread with ONE translucent slice of shaved deli ham between the slices. No mustard, no mayo, no cheese, no lettuce. (My mom was a well-known cheapskate and my brother and I was always hungry as kids.) My SIL said "I will never doubt you again. And she never has.

Minerva said...

All these stories are great! What a clever contest. Thank you.