You Need to Start Somewhere

Hello all, I hope you are well. And somehow managing to continue to go along every day in this world full of trauma. It's hard. And sadly, getting harder each and every day. Just remember, you have to take care of yourself first and foremost, because otherwise you can't help anyone else at all.

I have two things to look forward to that are keeping me from complete despair. The week after next, we have two little trips planned, and since we haven't really had any outings since our trip to WV over Memorial Day weekend, the fact that these trips are coming up have been keeping me going. I'm the sort of person who can put up with just about anything if I know there is something to look forward to, even if not for quite a while. 

I promised I'd show you my sock project that is in progress, but I keep forgetting to take a picture of it. The first sock is well into the foot section, so by the time I photograph it, instead of a piece o' sock, it might be a finished sock. 

But I did take this photo of a something I knit yesterday:

When did I become a knitter of fiddly things? Let me be clear, this is not my fave kind of knitting, but I have always avoided anything looking or sounding the least bit fiddly in the past. The stuffed doggie I knit was just fiddly in parts, but this project is nothing but fiddly! So we'll see how long it takes for me to finish it. Though it is nice to knit for a short amount of time and have something to show for it, LOL.

This is my first piece in the Fall Harvest Charm Set, by Susan B. Anderson. Apparently I do love kits, and I do have to say that Barrett Wool Co., Anderson's company with her son, put together really lovely kits that usually are not overly expensive, considering what you get. Anyway, I bought this kit a very long time ago, and much like the puppy kit, decided during a recent stash review that this fall I was actually going to make this thing. Making this tiny acorn reminded me of the quote by Ralph Waldo Emerson: "The creation of a thousand forests is in one acorn." Reminding me that in both knitting and life, you may start small, but it's the starting that is important.

So I need to figure out how to try to start in so many ways. I've gotten some things started, and they just need to continue. But with the world constantly bombarding me with so much terrible, I need to make my way through to finding positive things to start, to move along with, to keep myself sane.

I hope that those of you reading have been able or are able to start finding ways for yourself to be in the world without complete despair 24/7. Granted, what works today may not work tomorrow or next week, but we should all keep on trying so that we can work our way to better days, better health, just better all around. 

My plans for today are to post this, then work on finishing the laundry, and take a walk. I woke up this morning with a killer headache, so instead of taking my walk right away, I took some Tylenol and just sat for a while. The headache is close to being history, so the walk will come soon. I'll probably also work on the aforementioned sock, and read a bit. The Tim is cooking dinner tonight, so I can forget about having to plan that. 

Have a good day, however you are able to. (Well, unless that means murdering someone - that's not good and face it, they are likely not worth a lifetime in prison. Try to focus things elsewhere. 😉)

... And Start All Over Again

Nothing's impossible, I have found

For when my chin is on the ground

I pick myself up, dust myself off

And start all over again.

-- Lyrics by Jerome Kern and Dorothy Fields

Well, the end of last week certainly took care of any good feeling happening after the beginning of the week. For me, personally, and for a lot of us in the States as well. I was still adjusting to one gut punch when another one showed up saying "Hold my beer."

And now it's Monday morning, which let's face it, few people anticipate with joy. But we're all still here, and we have a choice - give up and be miserable forever, or pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off, and start all over again.

Yet again. There have been so many agains, it's easy to take the giving up route. And if that is what you choose, that's up to you. It's hard to collect your heart and soul when it's been pulverized and put it all together well enough to keep going. I don't know about you, but I tend to go back and forth on it. But then I realize that in spite of what I might wish to do, if I wake up every day, maybe the universe is saying I should try my best.

Easier said than done.

Whenever I am in the depths, and have even one iota of physical and mental energy, I try to make myself do one thing that I hope will be successful. Not necessarily any specific thing, and nothing major. Maybe I'll decide to take a long, quiet walk. Or get rid of one corner of clutter. Anything that I can "accomplish."

On Friday, I took some of the scarves and mittens we wore during the winter and washed them so they could be put away until needed again. (Yes, I  know it's nearly the end of June and we haven't needed them for a while. So sue me.) While I was waiting for the washing machine to finish, so I could hang them up near a window upstairs to dry, I was reading a book, and the main character was making breakfast for some guests, and she made Rosemary-Orange Muffins. Hm, I thought, that sounds good, as I like every word of that phrase. So I headed to Google, and found a recipe that sounded a) good, b) simple, and c) had "normal" ingredients (i.e., not something like "1 milli-teaspoon of the rosemary oil of the plant only found in Bulgaria"). I decided to give the recipe a try for Saturday morning's breakfast. This gave me something to look forward to doing, and in the state of mind where I found myself, that was a definite bonus.

I decided that since I had never tried the recipe, which said that it made 20 muffins, I'd cut it in half, just in case it wasn't really that great. Because if you are not that fond of something, having 20 of them is a lot.

But I shouldn't have worried, because THEY. WERE. YUMMY! 

I would say that it took me maybe fifteen minutes to do the prep - mostly zesting the orange took the longest to do - and the ingredients were things at least in our house are generally around anyway. Especially in the summer when we always have at least one rosemary plant going.

Here are the muffins cooling out of the pan:

And here is my fancy-schmancy presentation, along with the pieces of the zested orange and some cottage cheese:

If, like us, you are a fan of three things - rosemary, oranges, and muffins - you need to make these. First of all, the house smelled amazing while they were baking. Second of all, they were so very very good. And third of all, they taste just as good, maybe even a bit better, the longer they sit. (I wrapped the extras and froze them. Took one out to thaw yesterday and have with a cup of tea, and it was perfect!)

Now the woman in the book I was reading referred to Sarah Chase's recipe, and I must admit I have no idea who Sarah Chase might be. I used this recipe, and can personally recommend it. You can bet that these will be added to our "keepers" and that the next time I'll likely make all 20 of them. 😊

In conclusion, what I can tell you is that yes, I am tired. Very, very tired. I am beyond mad, sad, and frustrated. And so much of the world is crap, we didn't need anymore, but we got it anyway. I hope you can find something small to call a win, because if you are reading this, you woke up today and you might as well try to make that worth something. Even if it's only trying a new recipe that makes you happy.

Time to start all over again. 

Again.

End of May, See You in June

Between the events unfolding in the country/world, and the long holiday weekend, I just wanted to drop in and say "See ya" until next month.   I have things to do in preparation for our trip, and not much additional emotional space left at the moment.

If you are in the U.S., I hope you can have a good Memorial Day weekend.  Please don't feel bad if you feel bad - but pretty please don't feel bad if you feel good.  We need to allow ourselves to be happy and have fun even when despair visits.  Life goes on, even when we wish/think it shouldn't, and it is up to each of us to make it have meaning, joy, and purpose.  

For those of you in other places, I hope you also can enjoy the upcoming weekend even if it's not a holiday weekend where you are.

We will head to West Virginia tomorrow to get together with some family, to laugh, to talk, to complain, and to be grateful we can be together, when other families no longer have that luxury.

Enjoy your weekend.  Enjoy your loved ones.  Be grateful for what you have.

And please remember to be kind to each other.

See you soon.

Small Things

Hi all.  I hope everyone is doing well, or at least as well as you can be doing.  This is not an easy time to keep your chin up, with so much happening all at once to try and stomp down any little bits of happy and/or contentment you may feel.  

I have been feeling quite bereft lately, not just for myself (which I am prone to, unfortunately, whether or not it's really real), but for the world at large.  Election crap, Putin's determination to ruin Ukraine, climate change, almost all of the -isms and -ogyny are at an all time high, abortion rights, guns, guns, guns being the answer to everything.  For me, there are times when even though a lot of it has been ongoing, it all seems to be a punch to the gut and it's hard to not just stay a little positive, but to feel that anything you are trying to do to help is not even worth it anymore.

Sometimes there is nothing that can really help me feel better, no matter what I try or how others try to help.  But other times, small things can at least make me smile and even give me a genuine laugh and so for those few minutes, things are better.

Two examples from recent days:

Saturday was the Kentucky Derby.  Growing up, we *always* watched it on TV, as my parents were die-hard fans of horse racing.  When they would go to the track in person (usually we went as a family), we always hoped my dad's horse would win, because if he won, he would generally give us a share of his bounty.  But my mother had two hard and fast rules about horse races: 1) ALWAYS bet on a gray horse, and 2) always bet on the long shot, because "you never know what might happen."  Even if she placed a bet on another horse more likely to win, she would also always place a $2.00 bet on a gray horse and/or a long shot.  Which of course my father thought was ridiculous.  

Anyway, this year a long shot horse came from behind - last, actually - to win the whole thing!  The odds were 80-1, meaning that my mother would have come away with her $2 bet yielding $160.00 and some change.  This pleases me even now, thinking about it.  Along with the comment she would likely make to the effect of "Shows what your father knows."  Even if it happened once every 5 years, she would make sure to point out that my father was not always the expert he thought he was ... 😏

The second thing making me smile arrived in the mail yesterday:

I ordered these earrings from an Etsy shop mentioned on a podcast I was watching last week.  They were very inexpensive, and the kitty and the goldfish in the bowl just really amused me.  I figured they would be a fun pair to wear, and the colors are so summery, they just appealed to me.

I have to tell you, they are even better in person!  I opened the package, and was so pleasantly surprised.  The Tim said, "So ... you bought those for YOU?" and when I said yes, he just shook his head.  You know, because he is NO FUN, people!  These earrings are awesome, and I shall wear them tomorrow to my therapy appt because my therapist has a orange cat named Marmalade, and she is always bringing me up to date on his antics. 

I still don't feel better about most things going on.  But these two small things - one event and one pair of earrings - gave me a reason to smile and be happy.

I hope you find a small thing or two that helps you.

Taking a Break

Pandemic.  Taliban.  Earthquakes.  Guns.  Global Warming.

The world is too much with me right now, I'm afraid.  So I need to take a break for this week and will see you again soon.

Take care of yourselves.

Oh Canada! Oh Rest of the World!

When I was a little kid, and would say I hated someone, my mother would always say, "Don't say that.  It's not good to hate people, and besides it takes too much energy."  Years later, she mentioned someone, ans said, "You know, I think I hate her."  I pointed out what she told me, and she said, "Yeah, well, it takes very little energy to hate her." 

And I have to say, the Orange Menace occupying the White House  definitely falls into that category.  Words cannot describe my loathing for him and his group.  On top of of which, he has decided that the last few countries who were are friends need to know "who's in charge," and wants to teach them a lesson. 

To my friends in Canada, and the rest of the world - PLEASE know that he does not speak for me, or for a large number of people in this country.  He is just simply one of the most terrible persons ever, and has always been that way.  I've got nothing, as far as understanding or explaining why anyone supports him.

I do my very best to try not to talk about it here, but lately he has just gone above and beyond, even for him, and I just want any readers who are not from the U.S. to know that I do not support his actions, his behavior, or his ideas. 

God help us all.  Now onto the week.