Thinking of My Mom Today

Today marks 37 years since my mom died. That's a long time ago, but I still think of her - and often talk to her - every single day. 

I love this picture. She said she was probably about 4 years old here, and that people used to bring ponies around the neighborhood when she was a little girl and parents would have their kids photographed on the ponies. When I was a little kid, I used to think my life was supremely lacking and unfair because no one brought a pony - or any other animal - around the neighborhood for any reason, ever. To be 100 percent perfectly honest, if someone brought a pony or a horse or a donkey, or any other out-of-the-ordinary animal to the neighborhood today, I would want a picture with it - even if, for the animal's sake, I wasn't *on* it. 

WHERE HAVE THE NEIGHBORHOOD PONIES GONE???

Anyway, my mother was a lot of fun. After my dad died, and my middle sister finished college and got married and moved away, it was just the two of us for about 10 years. They weren't easy, since we didn't have a lot of money, and she had health issues, but we did have a good time, and I have the best memories of spending time with her. 

This is, I think, her high school graduation photo. It's nice to think of her being so happy and having so much ahead of her, before things that come with adulthood had actually arrived. 

She pretty much always looked like a version of this photo, so I could always recognize her in the bazillion pictures she had from friends and family. 

Though towards the end of her life, when she was probably about a year or so from dying, she had lost a LOT of weight and though she still had all of her hair, it was cut very short so that she didn't have to fool with it much. At the time, she lived with my sister and brother-in-law, and their four kids. She was confined to a wheelchair, so didn't get out as much as she had for all of her life. 

My sister and brother-in-law were invited to a barbecue at a country club where their friends were members during this one particular summer. The friends knew my mother as well, and told my sister to bring her along, since there would be people there that she knew, and it would be a chance for her to get out, etc. So they all got ready and headed to the country club, and for a while at least, things went well. Then a woman who knew my brother-in-law through his work (he is a labor lawyer) came up to talk to him, and he introduced my mother. Well, apparently this woman was one of those types who sees elderly people - particularly those in wheelchairs - as infantile. So she started talking to my mom like she was a little kid - you know, "Oh how ARE you sweetie? Is this fun for you?" And my sister could tell my mom was getting annoyed. 

Then the woman said, "Oh I know who you remind me of - Nancy Reagan!" and my mother responded, "Well that's not good." To which the other woman said, "Oh that's a compliment, I love her and think she is so beautiful." To which my mother said, "Well, then you're a damn fool."

And then they went home. Like, *right* after that. 😂😂😂

That, my friends, is a perfect story about my mother. She could be perfectly nice, and pleasant to anyone and everyone. But she did not suffer fools gladly. When my sister told us about this, none of us were surprised even one small bit. And she had always been like that, it's not something that developed as she got older. 

Yeah, I've got a million stories, and of course she also had a bazillion sayings and expressions, some of which I've shared here. So although I miss her every day and would love for her to be here still (but she'd be over 100 years old, and The Tim said he doesn't think he could take that, LOL), most of my memories are happy ones, or of fun things we did together. She believed that life was to be enjoyed, and as far as I can tell, she enjoyed her life for the most part. 

I know I am like her in a lot of ways, as are my sisters. But there was only one person who was actually her. So raise a glass today and do a "goddam toast" in her honor. 

That is, if you can bear it, since it's "hotter than Billy be damned." 😉

Valentine's Day 2025

Hello and Happy Valentine's Day! I know that a lot of people have a lot to say about this day, but at our house we love it. As I've said before, I was raised to see Valentine's Day as a day to be happy for those you love - be it family members, friends or romantic partners. So it's always been a happy day for me, with a special treat thrown in. The Tim and I sometimes get little gifts for each other, but we always give each other a card.

This year, Valentine's Day is bittersweet, because it would have been Pip's 14th birthday. But we know he'll still have a good birthday, especially since some of our other kitties he is with now have also had birthdays on this day, so I know they are enjoying it together.

I have some special treats for Milo the Koodle, Alfie, and Esme today, as well as a flavor of canned food they particularly like that I will give them for dinner. I did find a little gift for The Tim today - a bottle of red pepper cooking oil. He is a firm believer in the hotter the better, and I'd never seen this kind of oil before, so I figured I would get it for him. It was a little splurge, so I saved it to give him today. 😊

Today in Philadelphia is also the big parade to celebrate the Eagles' Super Bowl Championship. It should be fun. The last/only other time they won, back in 2017, we went to the parade, and even though it was really really cold, it was a blast. This year, The Tim has to work, and I don't want to go on my own, so I'll watch it on TV with the kit kats, while being warm and cozy inside. When the Phillies won the World Series in 2008, I couldn't take a day off to go to the parade, so I'm hoping they will manage to make it happen again so we can go to one of those, then I'll feel like I've managed to be a true Philadelphia fan.

The weather for the weekend looks to be icky, so I have every intention of staying in and being as cozy as possible. My sweater project - which I abandoned for most of January - has been picked up again, and I started a pair of socks the other day, so I have at least two knitting projects to keep me busy. And I have two books from the library to occupy me as well, so even if The Tim decides to nap most of the weekend, I have plenty to entertain myself!

Not much else to report. I did find a little mini chocolate-raspberry ganache cake from one of our fave Italian bakeries around here to have for dessert tonight, so that will be a nice treat. And we will likely drink a toast to our sweet boy, who sadly couldn't be here for his 14th birthday on the 14th. 💔

A person commented on a social media post that she didn't understand why people had pets, because when they die it is so heartbreaking. Well, hello - when anyone dies it's heartbreaking if they meant something to you, right? I didn't want to point that out because a) duh, and b) why acknowledge dumbassery, right? (Maybe that should be a mantra for the next four years ...) Let's face it, people are weird and I often don't think they consider how things sound typed out as opposed to spoken out loud.

ANYWAY. 

Have a lovely Friday, whether you consider it a special day in any way or not. It always leads in to a weekend, and for most of us, that is a good thing. So enjoy your Friday, have a good weekend, and be the person you would like if you met yourself.

Pip

If you follow me on Instagram or on Facebook, you already know this. But I am heartbroken to tell you that this past Saturday, February 1, 2025, our sweet boy Pip joined his brothers and sisters in heaven.

Pip first came to live with us when he was just short of a year old. He had recovered from having his back left leg amputated, and a friend of mine - Kate Gagnon Osborn - had been fostering him. She suggested that he would be a good fit for our family. (Fun fact: about a year later, she would foster the dog that would become another member of our family, Dug!)

When Pip joined us, we had Jetsam, who had been alone for about a year after we lost two other kitties within a week of each other. They became fast friends, and we could tell Jetsam was glad to have a companion again. Pip loved Jetsam right away, and things felt more complete again. 

Pip never met someone - human or otherwise - that he didn't make friends with. We used to joke that if we brought an alligator home, he'd make it his friend. Anyone else who joined the family was immediately fine with him, even if the others might take a while.

He was our sweet boy, cuddly, purry, and playful. He was also the family narc, making sure that we knew if something wrong occurred. He loved it when people came to visit (more friends!), and loved going out in the garden for a walk around, once he realized (starting over every single year) that it was a safe place.

He had a great Christmastime this year, which made us (and him!) happy. Last October, the vet said he had lost a bit more weight than before. He wanted to do all kinds of tests to see if it might be cancer or something, but we decided that as long as Pip was happy and his usual self, we were leaving it alone. Going to the vet was one of the few things that stressed him out, even more than any of the others, and we wanted to avoid that. 

In the last few weeks, you could tell he didn't feel well. He slept more, and though everything else was pretty much the same, he wasn't his usual Pippy self. And then his back leg - the only one he had - started not working too well. 

I kept telling him that he needed to let us know when he was just too unhappy or sick to go on, because like I said, he was clearly not feeling his best. On Saturday morning, when I went downstairs to give everyone their breakfasts, he was sitting next to the heater, and he looked at me sadly and meowed even sadder. So I knew he was telling me. 

Fortunately, the vet could take us a couple of hours after we called. All the others told him goodbye, and we put him in the carrier to go to the vet, which is about a block away from our house. It was a *very* sunny day, and we talked to him and told him the sun came out for him the whole way there. 

And by the time we went to take him out of the carrier at the vet's office, he was already gone. We agreed that one of the rays of sunshine decided that it couldn't wait any longer for him to join in making the world bright and making people smile, so that's what happened on our way there. I like to tell myself it was quick and he didn't even have time to think about it, because I hate to think he was panicked in the carrier for the last seconds of his existence. 

Pip was a happy boy, and from all that we could see and tell, he had a happy life. We tried our best, and I like to think he knew that - he seemed to know that he was beloved, and he really was.

He would have turned 14 on the 14th of the month - Valentine's Day. So rather than have a little party for him, we'll do our best to celebrate that he was ours for as long as he was. Maybe by then we'll have his ashes here at home with all of us.

 

God bless you, Pip. We will love you forever, and will never be able to stop remembering how you saved our lives. I hope you were extra happy to see your Welcoming Committee in heaven - I know they were happy to see you!

Please give all of your family members some extra love today, however you can. Pip was all about love, and knowing that other people and animals were getting some extra love on his behalf would make him happy.

Sorrow

Hamlet  

May 5, 2009 - January 25, 2022

I can't bear to write it all out again right now.  If you want to know what happened, I shared a post on both Instagram and Facebook. (It's nice that you can write it on Instagram and it will share it other places if you like.) 

Hug your loved ones, furry and otherwise. 

And please keep a good thought and prayer for our sweet boy.

Love and Be Loved

I promise this blog will not become a "Bible Quote of the Day" thing, but I love this image, and I think it's good to be reminded of the quote from time to time.

I just finished reading a tribute from a colleague to his mother, who was found in a lake in a remote area of Ontario, Canada, where her fishing boat had overturned in the bad weather there a couple of days ago.  An extremely sad thing, devastating of course to her family.  But his tribute to her and the accompanying photos, showing her love of nature, fishing, and life on the lake were as much a celebration of her as it was a remembrance.

But the thing that shone through more than anything was the love he had for his mother.  The link of their souls that will never be gone.  

At a time when so many people are estranged from their families, and either have lost the love they had for them, or have had it diminished, it was a reminder that love is, in fact, the most important thing.  If your love is for your family, good for you.  But it's the love that is important.  Love yourself, and love someone.  They don't have to be a blood relation, just love someone.

And make it the kind of love that allows you to celebrate them, even when the worst happens.  It's the one thing that never dies.

Karma

I had a different post in mind for today, but it can wait.  I wanted to ask you to please keep a good thought and if you are the praying type, a prayer for some friends of ours.

Yesterday, Hamlet's fellow guide dog and partner, Karma, headed to doggie heaven.  They lived together for 9 years, and guided their people Sharon and Jeff for all of that time.  Sharon and Jeff of course, loved them both as their dogs, not just as their guides, and Karma was one of the happiest pups ever.  She was a black Lab mix, slightly smaller than Hammy, but with the biggest puppy personality!  She was all wiggles and kisses.  Shortly after Hamlet retired and came to live with us, Karma was retired and went to live with a friend of Sharon and Jeff's named Karen.  That was another match of epic love, and Karma had a happy retirement filled with another family of love, fun, and adventures.

My favorite Karma memory was of the couple of times we visited Sharon and Jeff to see if adopting Hamlet might work out.  Karma immediately fell in love with The Tim.  Whenever we would sit down, she would actively push me off of the couch, so she could cuddle up next to him!  She would give him about a thousand kisses and demand constant pets (and of course he loved it too).  She was one of the sweetest pups I've ever met or been around, and I know that today, Sharon, Jeff, and Karen and her family feel bereft that she is no longer around to give them cuddles, comfort, and kisses.

Here is a photo from a few years ago, when we all converged on Jeff and Sharon's house to have a reunion, as well as meet their new guide dogs.  This is Karma and Hamlet giving nose kisses (after which they both went crazy realizing who each other were!), while Sharon is in the background with her new guide dog, Oakley, who clearly wants in on the fun.

When you think about it, guide dogs have such a broad grouping of family - their original families when they are born; then the puppy raisers who socialize and give them basic training; then those that they guide; and then finally their retirement families.  That's a lot of changes for a doggie life - but it's also a LOT of love from so many people the whole time!  

Happy trails, Karma, and enjoy wiggling, cuddling, kissing, and playing all of the time in heaven.  Thank you for being an angel on earth before you became one of the angels above.

A Poem for a Monday

Hello all - I came across this poem this morning, and thought it was worth sharing.

Today I asked my body what she needed,
Which is a big deal
Considering my journey of
Not Really asking That Much. 

I thought she might need more water.

or protein.

or greens.

or yoga

or supplements

or movement.

But as I stood in the shower

Reflecting on her stretch marks,

Her roundness where I would like flatness,

Her softeness where I would like firmness,

All those conditioned wishes

That bundle of 

Never-Quite-Rightness,

She whispered very gently:

Could you just love me like this?

-- Hollie Holden

Unexpected Unraveling

I'm joining Kat and everyone today for Unraveled Wednesday.  This time, it actually involves some unraveling, which in the end is OK, but which is also something that was not really fun to do.

Before we get into that, here is what I am currently reading:

So far I'm only a few pages in, but I already like it and hopefully that will continue.  I've been wanting to read it since it came out, and my turn on the library hold list finally happened.

On to the unraveling ...

I had been making slow but steady progress on my Pabaig, and had separated for the sleeves, and [I thought] I had finished the front knitting.  I went to start the back, and when I reviewed the pattern instructions, I thought to myself, "Hm, I don't remember it going that way."  But since I had also been working on other projects, I just figured I wasn't remembering the details.  I got a few rows in, and looked at the instructions again, and realized that I had misinterpreted them for the front, and I would end up with two badly mismatched sides of the sweater!  Ugh.  So off to the frog pond, where I went back to the first row after separating for the sleeves, and started over.  

As a result, it looks like the red blob of before, but with a bit more length.  Sigh.

However, since I discovered it before thinking I was nearly finished, it didn't bother me as much, and I'm moving right along again.  So the whole thing will take a bit longer, but since I hadn't really given myself a deadline, I'll just finish it when I finish it, with no regrets.

But I would like to point out that the yarn IS fingering weight, so there was a lot more to rip out and it took a stupid amount of time.  Such is life.

******

It occurred to me today that with it being the 18th anniversary of the September 11 attacks, any child born that year is starting their first year of college this year (if they decided to go to college in the first place).  Which means in some ways, an entire lifetime has passed since that horrible, sad day.  Time really does go on, no matter how much it stands still for you when something awful happens.  I hope for the survivors and all of the families affected, that they have reached the point where the first memories of their loved ones are the best and not the saddest.

Don't forget to say I love you today.  This day is a reminder that tomorrow doesn't always come.

Sweet Baby Jack the Kitten

That sweet face!

Jack the Kitten

Born:  early May 2016  Adopted:  October 2, 2016   Died:  June 5, 2019

No one wants to write this kind of post, and no one wants to read this kind of post, especially leading into a weekend.  But I wanted to do it before much more time passed because you should know.

The photo I had originally planned to post on Wednesday, with Jack inspecting

my latest knitting project that I was going to discuss.

The day before yesterday - Wednesday of this week - we lost our Jack.  It was quick, unexpected, and we are all still reeling.

Always on the move

As you know, in my previous post, I showed photos and told about how he had been helping me in the garden on Sunday.  And of course, since then, he'd been his usual happy, active, funny self.  When I left for work on Wednesday morning, he was there as usual, saying goodbye as we did each day when I left for work (we have a whole little ritual in our house).

His photo on the adoption site, The Philly Kitty

Wednesday was The Tim's day off, and he left in the morning to do a grocery shop.  He was gone no more than an hour, and when he got home, he said he could hear Jack crying, but he couldn't figure out where he was.  After looking, he saw him at the foot of the basement steps.  When he went down to investigate, Pip was with Jack and very concerned.  Jack was unable to put weight on his back legs.  The Tim thought maybe he had been running and jumping around and fell or something like that, and had hurt or broken something.  So he called our vet, who had no appts available until sometime next week (WTF?), and then decided to take him to the VSEC here in town, where we had taken Dug for his specialty tests and diagnosis when he was failing.  He called me at work and said to leave, take a cab, and get there ASAP.

Window closeup

It turned out that it was not an injury from a fall or anything else, but rather related to a heart condition that Jack had that we did not know about.  (Which is ironic because he had the best heart of all!)  The vet said that we shouldn't feel bad, because in cats so young, it is not common to check for heart problems unless something manifests itself, and this is unpredictable at best.  Jack had suffered FATE - Feline Aortic Thromboemolism - and in his case, of the Saddle, which is of course the area that controls the back leg muscles.  It is sudden and painful, paralyzes the back legs, and though it can be treated, most treatments are not successful, and not for very long periods of time - as in, not even always a week or a month.  They gave him medicine to control the pain, but there was no way we wanted him to suffer at all or any longer, and especially not be able run and pop around like he did every waking moment.

Sunshine belly

They brought him to us, and we spent about half an hour talking and singing to him, and settling him down to the point where he was purring.  He was clearly comforted and glad we were there, and though it was awful, we felt the same.  Fortunately, the injections the vet did acted quickly, and he left quietly and peacefully to join St. Francis and so many loved ones that will take care of him and play with him and love him until we can all be together again.  He wanted to stay, I'm sure, but wouldn't have known how, and we could not bear the thought of him limited in any way.

Always ready to assist, and he loved knitting projects!

Jack was only three years old.  He should still be here, feisty and intrepid as always, still enjoying himself, still cuddling, playing, exploring, helping, making that little noise that only he made. We were talking about it yesterday, and he never ever did anything bad.  He would get in trouble for being stinker, but he didn't have the capacity to be a bad kitty.  When he joined our family, it was after we had lost Dug in the summer, and as The Tim said, he brought us some much needed joy.  We called him Jackie Joy most of the time, since it described him and how he looked at everything in his life.  (He was also known frequently as Jack Attack, or BooBoo, but mostly Jackie Joy.)

His first time in the garden

This is a huge loss for all of us, and the fact that it was quick and unexpected makes it all even harder.  We are glad for some of the small mercies:  1) that The Tim was off from work that day, 2) that even if he had the episode right after The Tim left the house, that it was only an hour or less until he could help him, 3)  that Pip stayed with him, 4) that we could be with him and help him even when we never ever wanted to let him go, and 5) that such a wonderful group of people exist in the world to help.  I can't say enough about the VSEC staff, who sadly for them often see people and their sweethearts at in the worst possible scenarios.  The kindness, empathetic, and immediate treatment of Jack and of our feelings makes them all heroes as far as I'm concerned.

The first time he got to hang out with his brothers on the bed

So we are sad, and it will take all of us a while to adjust, and as my mother used to say, you never get over it, you just get used to it.  To quote The Tim from Wednesday, "Life can turn on a dime, can't it?"

Exploring the goodies from Santa with Pip

But thank God (or whoever/whatever you believe in) that there are Jacks in this world and that they find us.  He truly saved us, and his everyday love and joy made it clear that he was a happy boy.  So yes, be sad that he is no longer with us here to cuddle, see, and laugh about.  But then try to live a joyful life however you can.  Whether it's chasing a bug, helping/assisting even if not asked, or just enjoying everyone and everything around you, try to find some joy every single day.

Always happy to lounge in the garden!

That is the main thing about Jack - he was joyful without even trying.  He lived a good life every day, and shared it all with us.  He was our baby, our shadow, our goofball.  Please give your family - any and all of them - lots of love, joy, and kisses for us and for Jack.  Now he really is an angel in every sense of the word.

Sleepy baby boy.  Things will never be the same.

I hope you are all able to have a good weekend, and that you will always remember to say I love you whenever you get the chance. Enjoy your life when you can, because we only get one chance.  Take care, and thanks for all of the wonderful, funny, and kind things you have always said about our sweet baby Jack the Kitten.  

Festive Furball Friday of Christmases Past

I am especially missing our sweet Jetsam this Christmas season.  He used to love being involved in all of it, all the time.  (The others participate, but thankfully not every minute - let's just say they don't "get" it the way Jetsam seemed to ...)

But Christmas is as much about yesterday as today, so I'm sharing these photos with you, and I hope that you have a loved and adored one who, even if you miss them being right here to hug, makes you happy to love and remember.  

Have a Happy Christmas weekend!

 Helping The Tim check the string of lights

Looking to see if Santa's sleigh is on its way 

A kiss for Rudolph

Bleak

I have no words, and yet so many words, to express how I am feeling.  But rather than try to organize those words and my thoughts coherently, let me share some of Anne Lamott's words, from one of her books, Plan B: Further Thoughts on Faith:

"Hope is not about proving anything.  It's about choosing to believe this one thing, that love is bigger than any grim, bleak shit anyone can throw at us."

Please tell someone that you love them today - people, pets, the air, trees.  It will always be more important than anything else.

***********

Meanwhile, I hope this will at least make you smile.  I call this "The Ridiculous Trinity" and it's on my windowsill in my office. 

Take care of yourselves.  I'll be back again tomorrow.

The Long (But Happy) Haul

On Facebook, there is a loooonnnnnngggg personal message thread with myself, my niece Amanda, and my friend Lisa, covering every possible type of topic, rant, and amusing comment possible.  I don't really remember how we got to the topic of weddings (probably commenting on some celebrity wedding or divorce), but I commented that it seems that these days, weddings are a huge, elaborate, expensive production.  People are obsessed with their weddings.  And then, they are unwilling to put the same level of commitment and work into the actual marriage.  So you have Broadway-show-type wedding days, followed by marriages that break up sometimes within the same year.  (My husband's family excels at this kind of thing.)

Why am I going on about this?  Well, because at approximately 5:45 p.m. this evening, it will be 37 years of wedded bliss/annoyance/indifference for me and The Tim.  That's a long time.  Some days longer than others, as those in any kind of relationship I'm sure will understand.

Our wedding was small.  We have spent more years than not barely making it to pay the bills.  We don't have children, and have spent so much time listening to how we should because you don't know true love until you are a parent.  We have been called self-obsessed because we are not parents.  We have been there for each other when our own parents died.  We have rejoiced and enjoyed the births and other milestone moments of our many nieces and nephews, great-nieces and great-nephews.  We have adored and continue to adore all the pets who have been in our families.  We have gone through a lot of cancer together (me as the patient, him as the caretaker).  We have discussed many topics both important and ridiculous well beyond their lifespans.  We have proven my mother's comment that it was a good thing we found each other, "because it saves two other people."  And we have always agreed that we would never divorce because each of us are too stubborn to admit it isn't working.

And there are at least a million other things I could add to the list.

But whatever it's been, we have done it together - physically, spiritually, or mentally.  And even if not consciously, it's been work.  More work than planning a wedding that will be remembered for all time.

Because our wedding was one day, thirty-seven years ago.  But our anniversary is today.

Life can work out pretty well overall if you just pay attention.

The Kindness of People I Know in Real Life

Remember a few days ago when I wrote about the wonderful socks that my blog friend Lorraine knit for me?  That was the first post I wanted to write to let you know how lucky I felt - and feel - to have people who care and take the time to show it.  Personally, I long to be more like that, and really want to try to be.  But most creative things I do take me a long time to finish, and I usually spend more time wishing I'd make something than making it.

Anyway, I digress.

Someone I've known for a long time, since we met when working many years ago together at Rosie's, is Carol.  As a matter of fact, I saw the very first yarn she ever dyed and made into a scarf for a fundraiser at her kids' school.  Now of course she is a famous yarn dyer and knitting designer, and knitters all over the place know who she is.  We don't get to see each other all that often, but we are in touch a lot, and trade insults all of the time on Facebook.  Even if she was only an everyday knitter like I am, I would love her, because she is hilarious, caring, and shares a lot of the same social and political views that I do.

While I was recuperating from surgery, she posted a few pictures of square she had cut out to make a quilt, mentioning that she was making it for someone special.  The squares were so pretty, and some quite whimsical.  I've seen her quilts in pictures before, so I knew it would look amazing once it was finished.  I was also jealous of the person who would be receiving it.  A week or so later, she posted that it was in the mail to the recipient, and I thought "Oh that lucky person."

Never, ever, ever, did it even cross my mind that the person she was making the quilt for would be ME!  But a few days later, a nice, cushy package arrived.  The return address was Carol's, but I still didn't expect to find a quilt inside.  But I opened it up, and there was one of the best quilts I'd ever seen, and she had chosen fabrics that seemed to be made for me.

I've tried on more than one occasion to photograph all or parts of it, without any kind of success.  You can get the idea of it, but I have a dinky little digital camera and no real skills, so the things I wanted to be able to show you, I just could not capture no matter how much I tried.

Carol has been nice enough to grant me permission to use the photos she took and published on her blog when she wrote about making the quilt.  So now, you can see what it really looks like.  Take a look:

 Cut out squares

 Arranging the squares

 Look at the variety!

Finished quilt

 Folded quilt with awesome turquoise binding

 !!!

The back

I still cannot believe that someone made me a quilt - and as you can see, it's not a teeny tiny one, it's quilt-sized!  And as if that was not enough, she also enclosed a skein of her Black Bunny Fiber yarn and a hat pattern* - I mean it when I say that I was pretty overwhelmed by the contents of the package.   I see the quilt every single day, and it makes me smile, and feel so happy that I have a loving friend like Carol.  Everyone should be so lucky, you know?

But please don't tell her I've gotten all grateful and mushy here, because that might just ruin the whole relationship ... ;-)


*I will show you the yarn and hat pattern once I have rearranged my stash and it is safe.  Right now, the patterns and yarns are tucked deep into a closet, since the Koodle has recently decided that destroying both is the most fun thing on earth.

13 Things in 2013

Well, if there are any things I really wanted/needed to do before the end of the year, I'd better get moving!  To be honest, I can't think of anything that falls into this category (other than paying some bills this evening), but it is still almost the end of the year.

A lot of people do end-of-the-year posts about their most popular posts, their accomplishments, or even the worst about the year that is nearly at an end.  I have been giving it some thought, and decided I was going to list 13 Things in 2013, so here you go.

1.  In August, The Tim's oldest sister died unexpectedly.  It was sad, not just because of what it was, but because of how it happened.  And in the end, it seemed that after her husband died last year, she gave up on everything, and kinda died of a broken heart.  They were both sweet people, and were my favorites in his family.  I can only hope now that they are together and in peace.

2.  Shingles.  Enough said about that.

3.  I started going to a new internist this past summer, and so far it has been a real improvement.  My old doctor was someone I'd gone to for years, and though he was very nice, and very responsive, the past couple of times I'd had respiratory issues, I really feel that his hesitancy to give me strong drugs led to having pneumonia twice in two years.  I had a really bad cold a few weeks ago, which was taking the route that had led to pneumonia before, and the new doctor really decided to kick it at the beginning.  It cleared up and even my cough didn't last as long!

4.  I failed to complete two reading challenges I'd signed up to do.  But on the other hand, I read two more books than the goal I had set for myself on Goodreads!

5.  My knitting output was pitiful, but fortunately, I was pleased with what I did complete.

6.  My niece Julie and her husband Keith, who live in Brooklyn, are expecting a baby girl in May, so another great-niece will join the family!

7.  It snowed a couple of times this fall, and even though we didn't have a white Christmas, it was a cold and sunny Christmas day, which meant it felt the way it should, and that we could have a fire in our fireplace.

8.  I didn't manage to clean out/clear out as much stuff around here.  But on the plus side, I have been managing to slowly take the clothes that don't fit me any more but are still in decent shape, and donate them.  I hope they have made someone happy.

9.  Early in the year, I had the chance to meet a friend that I "met" on Facebook through two other real-life friends who knew her.  She was as much fun in person as she is online.  And it was a kick to be around a stranger that I felt like I already knew.

10.  Even though I wasn't as active and didn't exercise as much as I had planned to, I did manage to keep my weight about the same.

11.  In October, The Tim and I celebrated our 35th wedding anniversary, which counts for saving power if nothing else.

12.  Over the summer, I went with a group of friends to Stitch 'n Pitch.  Cole Hamels pitched, the Phillies won (a real treat this past season!), and it was one of the most fun times ever.

13.  We didn't have the chance for a big vacation, but we had a great trip to Rehoboth Beach in September, staying with my niece Amanda and her husband Pat, who have a house there that is shared in his family.  It was a wonderful weekend.  Dug went with us, and I think he had the best time of all.

So overall, except for the true sadness of losing Sheila, it was a year of more good than bad.  Death is a huge "bad" of course, but the important thing is for the rest of us to go on living our lives since we are still here.  We are all relatively healthy, pretty content, and ready for 2014.

Here's hoping it will be a good year for all of us who have made it through 2013!

Three Birthdays

Today marks three special birthdays.

Ninety-six years ago today, my dad was born. He was the oldest of four kids, who got split up to live with grandparents when his father was killed by a train.  My dad was 13 years old.  He and his sister Mary went to live with one set of grandparents, while another sister, Helen, and his baby brother John went to love with another set.

My parents got married the day after Christmas in 1941, when he had just joined the Army after Pearl Harbor.  They moved from base to base for a while, where - as my dad used to say - he "flew a desk."  I've posted pictures of him in his Army uniform here, and I can imagine that he liked the discipline and organization that Army life provided, even if it could be restrictive in other ways.  After he was out of the Army and he and my mom had a family, he always worked in the trucking industry.  He died when I was thirteen years old, from liver cancer, at a time when there were few real treatments for that disease, and it was more or less always a death sentence.  So I have lived most of my life without him, but I think of him every single day, and feel like I was lucky, not just because I knew him for 13 years, but because I knew from a young age that he wouldn't be around forever, and appreciated the time he was here.

The Tim's father was born on this day seventy-nine years ago.  He was a Navy man, having piloted fighter jets in World War II in the Pacific.  After the war, he and my mother-in-law started living their life together, having five children by the time they were finished.  He worked for years in the steel mills, and had barely retired when he was diagnosed with skin cancer.  He died in 1989.  Of course, my knowledge of him was only as an adult, but from all accounts, he had always been the same - kind, quiet, funny, and a calming influence overall.  He loved nothing more than a corny joke or a pun, and since I was a new audience, pulled out all of his old routines to try on me.  I also love corny jokes and puns, so we got along really well!  I think of him often, and miss him most when we are watching a funny TV show or movie, or someone comes up with a truly groan-worthy pun.  I wish he was still around to make us all laugh.

And, finally, about 18 years ago today, our crazy calico Tess was born.  "About" since she was a stray that we found, and to be honest, we "assigned" her August 21st as her birthday.  I knew my dad would be honored, and The Tim's dad would be amused and pleased if nothing else.  We always had at least a cat as a pet growing up, but Tess was truly one of a kind.  We suspected that her previous owners had abused her, because she was quick to react inappropriately, and her front teeth were sheared across her upper jaw.  She could be terribly mean to us and to the other kitties, but over time she settled down, and was actually truly sweet.  We used to joke that she ran a jihad and was planning to a) take over the world, and b) have us killed.  She just had the most unique personality of any cat ever.  She died after a bout with cancer, and just as in life, did not go gently into that good night.  I think of her so much, and miss seeing her, petting her, hugging her, and seeing what new thing would annoy her on any given day!

As a result, August 21 is always a little bittersweet at our house.  But then August 22 comes along, with two wedding anniversaries, and another one on August 25.  So today is followed by happy occasions, which means that we can't take too much time to dwell on any sadness.  Sometimes I think the universe works it out that way on purpose.

Just so you know, there's a space that only you can fill.

Just so you know, I loved you then -

I guess I always will.