I used to regularly wish my life away. I was always thinking about the next thing, how things would be better/cuter/nicer next week, month, etc. You get it. A couple of years ago, it occurred to me that this was a stupid way to live - and over this last year, I have especially tried to work at being mindful. If you recall, my word for the year was "grace," which also included being mindful.
I've been doing pretty well. I still look forward to things, but that is definitely different than wishing one's life away. But I must admit that the past couple of days, I've been wishing for tomorrow, big time.
I have to show up at the gastroenterologist's office tomorrow at 8:00 a.m. for an 8:30 colonoscopy. Assuming it will be able to be completed (please, God!), then I can start enjoying each day again. You see, this particular procedure has always been difficult for me. I have real trouble drinking the prep, and even more trouble keeping it down. So many times, I had to go home without having the procedure, or cancel before even leaving the house, because I wasn't "cleaned out." [Insert The Tim's favorite joke about medical proof that I am "full of sh*t"]
Since it is such a problem for me, I have to fast for 2 days. TWO DAYS. To say it makes me miserable would be kind. But I am hoping very strongly that this will be the last time I have to do this for years. I had a successful one last April, but instead of being able to wait for years like most people, my dr wanted me to have another one in 6 months. Ugh. And granted, it's now 8 months, since I kept forgetting to call for an appointment, but still, not having to do any of this again soon would be really wonderful.
The one thing that is successfully distracting me from my nausea and headache (a result of not eating) is Christmastime. Over the weekend, I finished most of what I needed to get for family gifts, and The Tim brought up the boxes of decorations from the basement. I am going to work on them as soon as I finish this post, and then hope to get finished after I get home tomorrow. The Tim wants to get the tree in the next couple of days, so all that will be left will be decorating the tree and starting to bake! YAY!!!!
Because it's ALWAYS good to see these guys again. :-)
(psst ... 18 days ...)